'What has he done that I should beat him?'repeated the Cadi;'and what brings him into my house?'Be not a vileperverse old man!'replied the barber;'I know the whole story. The long and the short of it is that thy daughter is in love with him and he with her;and when thou knewest that he had entered the house,thou badest thy servants beat himand they did so. By Allah,none shall judge between us and thee but the Khalif!So bring us out our masterthat his people may take himbefore I go and fetch him forth of thy house and thou be put to shame.'When the Cadi heard thishe was dumb for amazement and confusion before the peoplebut presently said to the barber'If thou speak truthcome in and fetch him out.'Whereupon the barber pushed forward and entered the house. When I saw thisI looked about for a means of escapebut saw no hiding-place save a great chest that stood in the room. So I got into the chest and pulled the lid down on me and held my breath. Hardly had I done thiswhen the barber came straight to the place where I was and catching up the chestset it on his head and made off with it in haste. At thismy reason forsook me and I was assured that he would not let me be;so I took courage and opening the chestthrew myself to the ground. My leg was broken in the falland the door of the house being openedI saw without a great crowd of people. Now I had much gold in my sleevewhich I had provided against the like of this occasion;so I fell to scattering it among the peopleto divert their attention from me;and whilst they were busy scrambling for itI set off running through the by-streets of Baghdadand this cursed barberwhom nothing could divert from meafter me. Wherever I wenthe followedcrying out'They would have bereft me of my master and slain him who has been a benefactor to me and my family and friends!But praised be God who aided me against them and delivered my lord from their hands!
Where wilt thou go now? Thou persistedst in following thine own evil devicestill thou broughtest thyself to this passand if God had not vouchsafed me to theethou hadst never won free from this straitfor they would have plunged thee into irremediable ruin. How long dost thou expect I shall live to save thee? By Allahthou hast well-nigh undone me by thy folly and thy perverseness in wishing to go by thyself!But I will not reproach thee with ignorancefor thou art little of wit and hasty.'Does not what thou hast brought upon me suffice thee,'replied I'but thou must pursue me with the like of this talk through the public streets?'And I well-nigh gave up the ghost for excess of rage against him. Then I took refuge in the shop of a weaver in the midst of the market and sought protection of the ownerwho drove the barber away. I sat down in the back shop and said to myself,'If I return homeI shall never be able to get rid of this accursed barberfor he will be with me night and dayand I cannot endure the sight of him.'So I sent out at once for witnesses and made a willdividing the greater part of my money among my peopleand appointed a guardian over themto whom I committed the charge of great and small directing him to sell my house and estates. Then I set out at once on my travelsthat I might be free of this ruffianand came to settle in your town,where I have lived for some time. When you invited me and I came hither the first thing I saw was this accursed pimp seated in the place of honour. Howthencan I be at my ease and how can it be pleasant to me to consort with youin company with this fellow,who brought all this upon me and was the cause of the breaking of my leg and of my exile from my country and family?'And he refused to sit down and went away. When we heard the young man's story (continued the tailor)we were beyond measure amazed and diverted and said to the barber'Is it true that this young man says of thee?'By Allah,'replied he'I dealt thus with him of my courtesy and good sense and humanity. But for mehe had perished and none but I was the cause of his escape. Well for him that it was in his leg that he suffered and not in his life!Were I a man of many words or a busybodyI had not done him this kindness;but now I will tell you something that happened to me,that ye may know that I am indeed sparing of speech and no impertinent meddleras were my six brothers;and it is this:
The Barber's Story.
I was living at Baghdadin the time of the Khalif Mustensir Billahwho loved the poor and needy and companied with the learned and the pious. One dayit befell that he was wroth with a band of highway robbersten in numberwho infested the neighbourhoodand ordered the chief of the Baghdad police to bring them before him on the day of the Festival. So the prefect sallied out and capturing the robbersembarked with them in a boat. I caught sight of themas they were embarkingand said to myself'These people are surely bound on some party of pleasure;methinks they mean to spend the day in eating and drinkingand none shall be their messmate but I.'Soof the greatness of my courtesy and the gravity of my understandingI embarked in the boat and mingled with them. They rowed across to the opposite bankwhere they landedand there came up soldiers and police officers with chainswhich they put round the necks of the robbers. They chained me with the restandO companyis it not a proof of my courtesy and spareness of speech that I kept silence and did not choose to speak? Then they took us away in chains and next morning they carried us all before the Commander of the Faithfulwho bade strike off the heads of the ten robbers. So the herdsman came forward and made us kneel before him on the carpet of blood;then drawing his sword,struck off one head after anothertill none was left but myself. The Khalif looked at me and said to the headsman'What ails thee thou thou struck off but nine heads?'