书城公版camellia girl
22904200000064

第64章

'Why not tell me now what these arguments are?'

'Because they would not bring us together again,for we can never be together again,and because they might alienate you from those from whom you must not be alienated.'

'Who are these people?'

'I cannot tell you.'

'Then you're lying.'

Marguerite stood up and walked to the door.

I could not stand by and watch such silent,expressive grief without being moved by it,when my mind's eye I compared this white-faced,weeping woman with the high-spirited girl who had laughed at me at the Opera-Comique.

'You shall not go,'I said,thrusting myself against the door.

'Why not?'

'Because in spite of all you've done to me,I still love you and want to keep you here.'

'So that you can throw me out tomorrow,is that it?No,it's out of the question!Our destinies are separate,let's not try to unite them,for them you might despise me,whereas now you have no choice but hate.'

'No,Marguerite,'I exclaimed,feeling all my love,all my desires awaken with her nearness,'No,I shall forget all that is past,and we will be happy,as we promised we would.'

Marguerite shook her head uncertainly,then said:

'Am I not your slave,your dog?Do with me what you will.Take me,I am yours.'

And removing her coat and her hat which she flung on to the sofa,she began feverishly unloosing the bodice of her dress,for,her condition deterioriating suddenly,as often happened in her illness,and with the blood rushing from her heart to her head,she was having difficulty breathing.

There followed a bout of dry,hoarse coughing.

'Have my coachman told,'she went on,'to drive my carriage home.'

I went down myself to dismiss the man.

When I returned,Marguerite was lying in front of the fire,and her teeth were chattering with cold.

I took her in my arms,undressed her where she lay without stirring,and carried her icy body to my bed.

Then I sat by her side and tried to warm her with my caresses.She did not speak,but she smiled at me.

Oh!How strange was the night that followed!The whole of Marguerite's life seemed to be concentrated in the kisses she lavished on me.I loved her so intensely that,in the transports of my loving frenzy,I wondered whether I should not kill her so that she would never belong to anyone else.

A month of such loving,body and soul,would be enough to bury most people.

Day found us both awake.

Marguerite was ghastly pale.She did not utter a word.From time to time,large tears flowed from her eyes and halted on her cheeks where they glistened like diamonds.Her weary arms opened now and then to hold me fast to her,and then fell back lifelessly on to the bed.

For a moment,I thought I could forget everything that had happened since the moment I had left Bougival,and I said to Marguerite:

'Would you like us to go away,to leave Paris?'