"As I was a-sayin, sir, I reckon yo"d not ha" much belief in yo" if yo" livedhere,--if yo"d been bred here. I ax your pardon if I use wrong words; butwhat I mean by belief just now, is a-thinking on sayings and maximsand promises made by folk yo" never saw, about the things and the life,yo" never saw, nor no one else. Now, yo" say these are true things, andtrue sayings, and a true life. I just say, where"s the proof? There"s manyand many a one wiser, and scores better learned than I am around me,-folkwho"ve had time to think on these things,--while my time has hadto be gi"en up to getting my bread. Well, I sees these people. Their livesis pretty much open to me. They"re real folk. They don"t believe i" theBible,--not they. They may say they do, for form"s sake; but Lord, sir,d"ye think their first cry i" th" morning is, "What shall I do to get hold oneternal life?" or "What shall I do to fill my purse this blessed day?
Where shall I go? What bargains shall I strike?" The purse and the goldand the notes is real things; things as can be felt and touched; them"srealities; and eternal life is all a talk, very fit for--I ax your pardon, sir;yo"r a parson out o" work, I believe. Well! I"ll never speak disrespectfulof a man in the same fix as I"m in mysel". But I"ll just ax yo anotherquestion, sir, and I dunnot want yo to answer it, only to put in yo"r pipe,and smoke it, afore yo" go for to set down us, who only believe in whatwe see, as fools and noddies. If salvation, and life to come, and whatnot, was true--not in men"s words, but in men"s hearts" core--dun yo" notthink they"d din us wi" it as they do wi" political "conomy? They"remighty anxious to come round us wi" that piece o" wisdom; but t"otherwould be a greater convarsion, if it were true."
"But the masters have nothing to do with your religion. All that they areconnected with you in is trade,--so they think,--and all that it concernsthem, therefore, to rectify your opinions in is the science of trade."
"I"m glad, sir," said Higgins, with a curious wink of his eye, "that yo" putin, "so they think." I"d ha" thought yo" a hypocrite, I"m afeard, if yo"
hadn"t, for all yo"r a parson, or rayther because yo"r a parson. Yo" see, ifyo"d spoken o" religion as a thing that, if it was true, it didn"t concern allmen to press on all men"s attention, above everything else in this "varsalearth, I should ha" thought yo" a knave for to be a parson; and I"d ratherthink yo" a fool than a knave. No offence, I hope, sir."
"None at all. You consider me mistaken, and I consider you far morefatally mistaken. I don"t expect to convince you in a day,--not in oneconversation; but let us know each other, and speak freely to each otherabout these things, and the truth will prevail. I should not believe inGod if I did not believe that. Mr. Higgins, I trust, whatever else youhave given up, you believe"--(Mr. Hale"s voice dropped low inreverence)--"you believe in Him."
Nicholas Higgins suddenly stood straight, stiff up. Margaret started toher feet,--for she thought, by the working of his face, he was going intoconvulsions. Mr. Hale looked at her dismayed. At last Higgins foundwords:
"Man! I could fell yo" to the ground for tempting me. Whatten businesshave yo" to try me wi" your doubts? Think o" her lying theere, after thelife hoo"s led and think then how yo"d deny me the one sole comfort left-that there is a God, and that He set her her life. I dunnot believe she"llever live again," said he, sitting down, and drearily going on, as if to theunsympathising fire. "I dunnot believe in any other life than this, inwhich she dreed such trouble, and had such never-ending care; and Icannot bear to think it were all a set o" chances, that might ha" beenaltered wi" a breath o" wind. There"s many a time when I"ve thought Ididna believe in God, but I"ve never put it fair out before me in words,as many men do. I may ha" laughed at those who did, to brave it out like-but I have looked round at after, to see if He heard me, if so be therewas a He; but to-day, when I"m left desolate, I wunnot listen to yo" wi"
yo"r questions, and yo"r doubts. There"s but one thing steady and quiet i"
all this reeling world, and, reason or no reason, I"ll cling to that. It"s a"
very well for happy folk"---Margarettouched his arm very softly. She had not spoken before, norhad he heard her rise.
"Nicholas, we do not want to reason; you misunderstand my father. Wedo not reason--we believe; and so do you. It is the one sole comfort insuch times."
He turned round and caught her hand. "Ay! it is, it is--(brushing awaythe tears with the back of his hand). --"But yo" know, she"s lying dead athome and I"m welly dazed wi" sorrow, and at times I hardly know whatI"m saying. It"s as if speeches folk ha" made--clever and smart things asI"ve thought at the time--come up now my heart"s welly brossen. Th"
strike"s failed as well; dun yo" know that, miss? I were coming whoamto ask her, like a beggar as I am, for a bit o" comfort i" that trouble; and Iwere knocked down by one who telled me she were dead--just deadThat were all; but that were enough for me.
Mr. Hale blew his nose, and got up to snuff the candles in order toconceal his emotion. "He"s not an infidel, Margaret; how could you sayso?" muttered he reproachfully "I"ve a good mind to read him thefourteenth chapter of Job."
"Not yet, papa, I think. Perhaps not at all. Let us ask him about thestrike, and give him all the sympathy he needs, and hoped to have frompoor Bessy."