John Eames saw nothing more of Lily Dale till he packed up his portmanteau, left his mother's house, and went to stay for a few days with his old friend Lady Julia; and this did not happen till he had been above a week at Guestwick. Mrs Dale repeatedly said that it was odd that Johnny Eames did not come to see them; and Grace, speaking of him to Lily, asked why he did not come. Lily, in her funny way, declared that he would come soon enough. But even while she was joking there was something of half-expressed consciousness in her words--as though she felt it to be foolish to speak of his coming as she might of that of any other young man, before people who knew her whole story. 'He'll come quick enough. He knows, and I know, that his coming will do no good. Of course I shall be glad to see him. Why shouldn't I be glad to see him?
I've known him and liked him all my life. I liked him when there did not seem to be much about him to like, and now that he is clever, and agreeable, and good-looking--which he never was as a lad--why shouldn't I go on liking him? He's more like a brother to me than anybody else I've got. James,'--James was her brother-in-law, Dr Crofts--'thinks of nothing but his patients and his babies, and my cousin Bernard is much too grand a person for me to take the liberty of loving him. I shall be very glad to see Johnny Eames.' From all which Mrs Dale was led to believe that Johnny's case was still hopeless. And how should it not be hopeless? Had not Lily confessed within the last week or two that she still loved Adolphus Crosbie?
Mrs Eames also, and Mary, were surprised that John did not go over to Allington. 'You haven't seen Mrs Dale yet, or the squire?'
'I shall see them when I am at the cottage.'
'Yes;--no doubt. But it seems strange that you should be here so long without going to them.'
'There's time enough,' said he. 'I shall have nothing else to do when I'm at the cottage.' Then, when Mary had spoken to him again in private, expressing a hope that there was 'nothing wrong', he had been very angry with his sister. 'What do you mean by wrong? What rubbish you girls talk! And you never have any delicacy of feeling to make you silent.'
'Oh, John, don't say such hard things as that of me!'
'But I do say them. You'll make me swear among you some day that I will never see Lily Dale again. As it is, I wish I never had seen her--****** because I am so dunned about it.' In all of which I think that Johnny was manifestly wrong. When the humour was on him he was fond enough of talking about Lily Dale. Had he not taught her to do so, I doubt whether his sister would ever have mentioned Lily's name to him. 'I did not mean to dun you, John,' said Mary, meekly.
But at last he went to Lady Julia's, and was no sooner there than he was ready to start for Allington. When Lady Julia spoke to him about Lily, he did not venture to snub her. Indeed, of all his friends, Lady Julia was the one whom on this subject he allowed himself the most unrestricted confidence. He came over one day, just before dinner, and declared his intention of walking over to Allington immediately after breakfast on the following morning. 'It's the last time, Lady Julia,' he said.
'So you say, Johnny.'
'And so I mean it! What's the good of a man flittering away his life?
What's the good of wishing for what you can't get?'
'Jacob was not in such a hurry when he wished for Rachel.'
'That was all very well for an old patriarch who had seven or eight hundred years to live.'
'My dear John, you forget your Bible. Jacob did not live half as long as that.'
'He lived long enough, and slowly enough, to be able to wait fourteen years;--and then he had something to comfort him in the meantime. And after all, Lady Julia, it's more than seven years since I first thought Lily was the prettiest girl I ever saw.'
'How old are you now?' 'Twenty-seven--and she's twenty-four.'
'You've time enough yet, if you'll only be patient.'
'I'll be patient for tomorrow, Lady Julia, but never again. Not that Imean to quarrel with her. I'm not such a fool as to quarrel with a girl because she can't like me. I know how it all is. If that scoundrel had not come across my path just when he did--in that very nick of time, all might have been right betwixt her and me. I couldn't have offered to marry her before, when I hadn't as much income as would have found her bread-and-butter. And then, just as better times came to me, he stepped in! I wonder whether it will be expected of me that I should forgive him?'
'As far as that goes, you have no right to be angry with him.'
'But I am--all the same.'
'And so was I--but not for stepping in, as you call it.'
'You and I are different, Lady Julia. I was angry with him for stepping in; but I couldn't show it. Then he stepped out, and I did manage to show it. And now I shouldn't wonder if he doesn't step in again. After all, why should he have such a power? It was simply the nick of time which gave it to him.' That John Eames should be able to find some consolation in this consideration is devoutly to be hoped by us all.
There was nothing said about Lily Dale the next morning at breakfast.
Lady Julia observed that John was dressed a little more neatly than usual;--though the change was not such as to have called for her special observation, had she not known the business on which he was intent.
'You have nothing to send to the Dales?' he said, as he got up from the table.
'Nothing but my love, Johnny.'
'No worsted embroidery work--or a pot of special jam for the squire?'
'No, sir, nothing; though I should like to make you carry a pair of panniers, if I could.'
'They would become me well,' said Johnny, 'for I am going on an ass's errand.' Then, without waiting for the word of affection which was on the old woman's lips, he got himself out of the room, and started on his journey.