Man, your words have made my heart bleed; I have groaned over the treachery of our fathers, who knew not how to transmit to us the high rank they held from their forefathers.But 'tis a benevolent Genius, a happy Fate, that sends you to us; you shall be our deliverer and I place the destiny of my little ones and my own in your hands with every confidence.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
But hasten to tell me what must be done; we should not be worthy to live, if we did not seek to regain our royalty by every possible means.
PITHETAERUS
First I advise that the birds gather together in one city and that they build a wall of great bricks, like that at Babylon, round the plains of the air and the whole region of space that divides earth from heaven.
EPOPS
Oh, Cebriones! oh, Porphyrion! what a terribly strong place!
PITHETAERUS
Then, when this has been well done and completed, you demand back the empire from Zeus; if he will not agree, if he refuses and does not at once confess himself beaten, you declare a sacred war against him and forbid the gods henceforward to pass through your country with their tools up, as hitherto, for the purpose of laying their Alcmenas, their Alopes, or their Semeles! if they try to pass through, you put rings on their tools so that they can't make love any longer.You send another messenger to mankind, who will proclaim to them that the birds are kings, that for the future they must first of all sacrifice to them, and only afterwards to the gods; that it is fitting to appoint to each deity the bird that has most in common with it.For instance, are they sacrificing to Aphrodite, let them at the same time offer barley to the coot; are they immolating a sheep to Posidon, let them consecrate wheat in honour of the duck; if a steer is being offered to Heracles, let honey-cakes be dedicated to the gull; if a goat is being slain for King Zeus, there is a King-Bird, the wren, to whom the sacrifice of a male gnat is due before Zeus himself even.
EUELPIDES
This notion of an immolated gnat delights me! And now let the great Zeus thunder!
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
But how will mankind recognize us as gods and not as jays? Us, who have wings and fly?
PITHETAERUS
You talk rubbish! Hermes is a god and has wings and flies, and so do many other gods.First of all, Victory flies with golden wings, Eros is undoubtedly winged too, and Iris is compared by Homer to a timorous dove.
EUELPIDES
But will not Zeus thunder and send his winged bolts against us?
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
If men in their blindness do not recognize us as gods and so continue to worship the dwellers in Olympus?
PITHETAERUS
Then a cloud of sparrows greedy for corn must descend upon their fields and eat up all their seeds; we shall see then if Demeter will mete them out any wheat.
EUELPIDES
By Zeus, she'll take good care she does not, and you will see her inventing a thousand excuses.
PITHETAERUS
The crows too will prove your divinity to them by pecking out the eyes of their flocks and of their draught-oxen; and then let Apollo cure them, since he is a physician and is paid for the purpose.
EUELPIDES
Oh! don't do that! Wait first until I have sold my two young bullocks.
PITHETAERUS
If on the other hand they recognize that you are God, the principle of life, that.you are Earth, Saturn, Posidon, they shall be loaded with benefits.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
Name me one of these then.
PITHETAERUS
Firstly, the locusts shall not eat up their vine-blossoms; a legion of owls and kestrels will devour them.Moreover, the gnats and the gallbugs shall no longer ravage the figs; a flock of thrushes shall swallow the whole host down to the very last.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
And how shall we give wealth to mankind? This is their strongest passion.
PITHETAERUS
When they consult the omens, you will point them to the richest mines, you will reveal the paying ventures to the diviner, and not another shipwreck will happen or sailor perish.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
No more shall perish? How is that?
PITHETAERUS
When the auguries are examined before starting on a voyage, some bird will not fail to say, "Don't start! there will be a storm," or else, "Go! you will make a most profitable venture."EUELPIDES
I shall buy a trading-vessel and go to sea, I will not stay with you.
PITHETAERUS
You will discover treasures to them, which were buried in former times, for you know them.Do not all men say, "None knows where my treasure lies, unless perchance it be some bird."EUELPIDES
I shall sell my boat and buy a spade to unearth the vessels.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
And how are we to give them health, which belongs to the gods?
PITHETAERUS
If they are happy, is not that the chief thing towards health? The miserable man is never well.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
Old Age also dwells in Olympus.How will they get at it? Must they die in early youth?
PITHETAERUS
Why, the birds, by Zeus, will add three hundred years to their life.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
From whom will they take them?
PITHETAERUS
From whom? Why, from themselves.Don't you know the cawing crow lives five times as long as a man?
EUELPIDES
Ah! ah! these are far better kings for us than Zeus!
PITHETAERUS (solemnly)
Far better, are they not? And firstly, we shall not have to build them temples of hewn stone, closed with gates of gold; they will dwell amongst the bushes and in the thickets of green oak; the most venerated of birds will have no other temple than the foliage of the olive tree; we shall not go to Delphi or to Ammon to sacrifice; but standing erect in the midst of arbutus and wild olives and holding forth our hands filled with wheat and barley, we shall pray them to admit us to a share of the blessings they enjoy and shall at once obtain them for a few grains of wheat.
LEADER OF THE CHORUS
Old man, whom I detested, you are now to me the dearest of all;never shall I, if I can help it, fail to follow your advice.
CHORUS (singing)