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第19章 中国人的待客之道

A:With the 2008 Olympic Games being held in Beijing,the city has greeted friends from all over the world。

B:“How happy to have friends from far away!”said Confucius on the hospitality of the Chinese,who are proud to have many guests on celebrating occasions。

A:One example of Chinese hospitality can be seen from banquets。The Chinese like to serve guests with the best food they have。A Chinese banquet is made up of scores of dishes including cold dishes,hot fried dishes,salted dishes,sweet preserved fruit and fresh fruit。For a banquet of manhan quanxi,or the Complete Manchu-Han Banquet,a total of 108 dishes and 44 courses of dim sum are served。It takes three days and nights to consume it all。

B:And in the countryside,if a man marries,his parents will invite the whole village to a banquet for several days。

A:This kind of hospitality has much to do with countryside culture and tradition。It is also a Chinese way of making friends,although as a whole,the Chinese make friends on the principles of faith and trust。

B:Examples can be found in action films on the Chinese attitude towards friends。Jack Chan is a symbol of Chinese faithfulness to friends。In the movies,a good Chinese man is ready to do anything to help his friends。He is faithful as well as smart。

A:In Crouching Tiger,Hidden Dragon,faithful friend Li Murong would rather die than betray his friend。

B:It's probably because the Chinese like to judge people according to their attitudes towards parents,relatives and friends,only when a man treats these relationships well,can he be judged as a man of integrity。

A:A Chinese proverb says:“The friendship between noble gentlemen is as pure as water。”This shows the spiritual side of Chinese friendship,which is,making friends on the basis of mutual interests and a good personality。

B:As friendship in China takes various forms,sometimes foreigners find it intrusive of privacy。

A:That's true。

A:随着2008北京奥运会的举行,北京已经接待了来自世界各地的朋友们。

B:“有朋自远方来,不亦悦乎?”孔子说到了中国人的待客之道,那就是在庆祝隆重的场合时很自豪地邀请自己的朋友们。

A:一个中国典型的待客之道就是宴会了。中国人喜欢用他们最好的食物招待客人们。一个中国式的宴会由许多菜式组成,包括冷盘、热菜、咸的和甜的蔬果。一桌满汉全席一共有108道菜和44道点心组成,得花好几天几夜才能全部吃完。

B:而且在农村,如果一个男的结婚了,他的父母会邀请整个村庄的人吃上几天的宴席。

A:这种待客之道大多与农村文化和传统有关的,这同样也是中国人交朋友的的一种方式。但整体上来说,中国人交朋友的原则是信任。

B:在动作电影里可以找到这样的例子证明中国人对朋友的态度。成龙是中国人对朋友衷心的代表。在电影里,一个好人总是乐于为他的朋友两肋插刀,他既衷心又聪明。

A:在卧虎藏龙里面,衷心的李慕蓉宁愿死也不愿背叛他的朋友。

B:这也许是因为中国人喜欢根据他们对父母、亲人和朋友的态度来评价一个人。只有当一个人能处理好所有这些关系的时候,他才能称为是一个君子。

A:中国有一句谚语:“君子之交淡如水。”这表现了中国人之间友谊的精神层面,交朋友是以共同利益和好的人品为基础的。

B:由于友谊在中国有多种形式,外国人有时会觉得自己的隐私被侵犯了。

A:说的没错。

Banquet n。宴会

Dim sum n。点心

Crouching Tiger,Hidden Dragon 卧虎藏龙

Personal network

Throughout much of China's history,guanxi has been and remains a deep seated concept that lies at the core of Chinese society and the relationship between the people within it。Simply put,guanxi can be seen as who you know and what they perceive to be their obligation to you。

In China,an established network of quality contacts can help accomplish almost anything,and thus having good guanxi is a very powerful asset。

人际关系网

贯穿中国的历史,关系一直是中国社会人际关系深层的一个核心。简单的说,关系可以看作是你认识的人和他们对你的职责。

在中国,建立起优良的关系网几乎可以帮助你完成任何事情,所以有好的关系是非常有利的资源。

Human sentiment

Closely intertwined with“guanxi”is“renqing”an important vehicle in Chinese social exchanges。“renqing”which literally translates as human sentiment or human emotion is defined by one western scholar as“covers not only sentiment but also its social expressions such as the offering of congratulations,or condolences or the making of gifts on appropriate occasions”。The rule of“renqing”in Chinese society goes as follows:“If you have received a drop of beneficence from other people,you should return to them a fountain of beneficence”。

A Chinese who has done a favor for you automatically feels that he or she is owned a favor from you in return。Actually“renqing”follows Confucian notion of reciprocity。There are many Chinese expressions that are associated with“renqing”,such as giving somebody a“renqing”(song renqin)owing somebody a“renqing”(qian renqing)ect。

人情

与“关系”紧密相关的是人情,中国人社交的一个重要工具。“人情”字面上可以理解成人类的情感。这种情感被一个西方学者定义成不仅仅包括情感,还包括社会表情,例如表达祝贺、安慰或在恰当的场合做礼物。中国社会的人情原则是这样的:“滴水之恩当涌泉相报”。

一个主动帮你忙的中国人会觉得你欠了他什么。实际上“人情”就是孔子所说的礼尚往来、互惠主义。中国俗语里有些与人情相关的表达,例如“送人情”和“欠人情”。