When you ask people (which I have done many times) what it means to relax，most will answer in a way that suggests that relaxing is something you plan to do later-you do it on vacation，in a hammockhammock n.吊床，when you retire，or when you get everything done. This implies，of course，that most other times (the other 95 percent of your life) should be spent nervous，agitatedagitated adj.激动的，表现不安的，rushed，and frenziedfrenzied adj.狂热的，激怒的，狂乱的. Very few actually come out and say no，but this is the obvious implication. Could this explain why so many of us operate as if life were one great big emergency？ Most of us postpone relaxation until our “inbasketbasket n.篮，一篮” is empty. Of course it never is.
It is useful to think of relaxation as a quality of heart that you can access on a regular basis rather than something reserved for some later time. You can relax now. Its helpful to remember that relaxed people can still be super achievers and，in fact，that relaxation and creativity go hand in handin hand adv.在手头，在进行中，掌握住. When Im feeling upright，for example，I dont even try to write. But when I feel relaxed，my writing flows quickly and easily.
Being more relaxed involves training yourself to respond differently to the dramas of life-turning your melodramamelodrama n.情节剧 into a mellowmellow adj.(因熟透而)醇香的、甘美的，(颜色)柔美的，(声音)圆润的，成熟的，老练的 vt.& vi.使(变)醇香，使(变)柔美，使成熟 drama. It comes，in part，from reminding yourself over and over again (with loving kindness and patience) that you have a choice in how you respond to life. You can learn to relate torelate to v.涉及 your thinking as well as your circumstances in new ways. With practice，making these choices will translate into a more relaxed self.
放松自己
放松是什么意思？尽管一生中我们会成千上万次地听到这个词，但是几乎没有什么人好好琢磨过它到底意味着什么。
当你问别人(我曾问过许多次)放松意味着什么，大多数人的答案不外乎是，放松就是某些有朝一日你会做的事——那些你计划在假期里，躺在吊床上，退休以后，或把该干的事都做完之后才有时间做的事。这自然意味着大部分时间(你生命中95%的时间)应该是在紧张、焦虑、匆忙、疯狂中度过。没有什么人会站出来说不是这么回事，而事实就是那么回事。这是否能解释为什么我们那么多的人把人生看作是一件连续不断的紧急事件而奔忙不停？我们很多人把放松推迟到我们的“收件夹”清空之后。但我们的“收件夹”当然是永远不会空的。
不妨把放松理解成一种心态，是你可以时常受用、而不是什么非要留到以后才能享受的东西。你现在就可以放松。记住，会放松的人依然可以取得辉煌的成就。事实上，放松和创造往往如影随形。比如说，当我感到绷得紧紧的时候，我甚至不会试着去写点什么。但是我放松时，会感到下笔流畅自如。
要想变得更为放松，需要训练自己换一种方式对待生活中出现的种种事件——把生活中的“情节剧”变成一出温馨的戏剧。要做到这一点，在一定程度上就需要不断地用爱心和耐心提醒自己：对于生活的挑战做出何种反应的决定权在你自己手中。你可以学着去用新的方式对待自己的心绪和周遭情形。只要多实践，这些选择会帮你造就更放松的自我。
How to Grow Happiness
Step one：
Plant yourself deep in a bed of faithfaith n.信任，信念，宗教信仰，忠实，保证，诺言，约定，and pack it down solid and tight. Drench daily with positive thinking，and keep saturatedsaturated adj.渗透的，饱和的，深颜色的 just right. Mulch often with forgivenss，for this will help you grow. Quickly remove any seeds of worry，for they will soon germinate，and keep out the weeds of despair. Nourish disappointments with hope whenever it is needed，and always stay cool and shaded when you feel irritatedirritated adj.恼怒的，生气的 or heated. Trim away guilt or depression，for they create decay，and cultivate with happy memories as often as every day.
Step two：
Harvest the lessons of the past； just dig，pick，and hoe. And nurture the roots of the present，for now is when you flourishflourish vi.繁荣，茂盛，活跃，手舞足蹈，兴旺，处于旺盛时期 vt.挥动，夸耀 n.茂盛，兴旺，华饰，繁荣 and grow. Start planting for the future； set your goals in a row. Spade the bed well for all your dreams to grow.
Step three：
Remember that grief is a natural predator，so learn to tolerate some damage. Protect your garden with daily prayers，for this will help you manage. Bury the criticism and complaining，for they are injurious pests. Sow the seed of love wherever you may go-for joy，love，and laughter are surely bound to grow. Although the thornsthorn n.［植］刺，棘，荆棘 of life may be here to stay，just sprout a smile along the way...and be thankful for what you have today！
种植幸福三个步骤
步骤一：
把自己紧紧牢牢地埋在“信念”的土壤里。 每天浇灌以“积极”的思想，并始终保持湿润。 经常以“宽容”来护根，这样有利于幸福的幼苗成长。 一旦发现忧虑的种子，及时除掉，否则它们很快就会生根发芽，同时也将绝望消灭在萌芽状态。 在必要时，用希望来滋养失望；烦躁不安的时候，保持冷静。 修剪枝叶，修剪去愧疚和沮丧，否则很快出现衰枝败叶。每天用“幸福回忆”细心照料幼苗。
步骤二：
挖掘、收割、筛选，从“过往”收获经验。 精心照料“此时此刻”的根茎，因为这正是旺盛生长的时期。 有所计划与目标，着手种植“明天”。 翻掘一下泥土，为孕育明天的梦想做好准备。
步骤三：
记住，“不幸”是天生的肉食动物，明白它们带来的伤害在所难免，你就会对不完美多一分理解和宽容。 每天“祈祷”，保护你的花园，这有利于掌控。 将“批评”与“埋怨”这些害虫掩埋起来。 将“爱”的种子播散到你足迹所至的每个角落，“欢乐”、“爱”和“微笑”就会生机无限地发育成长。 哪怕生命“荆棘”满途，也要在一旁种上微笑的芽苗……不管一切如何，为今天你所拥有的全部心存感激吧！
Try to Remember the Good Things
When times become difficult (and you know they sometimes will)，remember a moment in your life that was filled with joy and happiness.
Remember how it made you feel，and you will have the strength you need to get through any trial.
When life throws you one more obstacle than you think you can handle，remember something you achieved through perseveranceperseverance n.坚定不移 and by struggling to the end.
In doing so，youll find you have the ability to overcome each obstacle brought your way.
When you find yourself drained and depleted of energy，remember to find a place of sanctuary and rest.
Take the necessary time in your own life to dream your dreams and renew your energy，so youll be ready to face each new day.
When you feel tensiontension n.紧张(状态)，不安，拉紧，压力，张力，牵力，电压 vt.拉紧，使紧张 building，find something fun to do. Youll find that the stress you feel will dissipate and your thoughts will become clearer.
When youre faced with so many negativenegative n.否定，负数，底片adj.否定的，消极的，负的，阴性的 vt.否定，拒绝(接受) and draining situations，realize how minusculeminuscule n.草写小字 adj.用草写小字写的，极小的 problems will seem when you view your life as a whole-and remember the positive things.
想想好事情
当你身陷困境的时候（你有时会），回想你生命中快乐和幸福的时刻。
回想它是如何使你快乐，你便有了走出困境的勇气。
当面对重重困难，你感觉举步维艰的时候，回想你以前是如何坚持到底战胜困难的最后时刻的。
这样，你就会发现你有能力克服每个障碍。
当你觉得筋疲力尽的时候，暂时离开，让自己稍作休息。
给自己留点时间做做梦，充一下电，这样你就能以崭新的面貌去面对每一天。
当你感觉到紧张的压力，做一些有乐趣的事吧。 你会发现压力再渐渐消逝，你的想法也渐渐明朗了。
当你面对重重困难的时候，要意识到相对于你的整个生命，这些难题其实是微不足道的——铭记你生命中美好的东西。
Make Use Your Opportunity
The air we breathe is so freely available that we take it for granted. Yet without it we could not survive more than a few minutes. For the most part，the same air is availableavailable adj.可用到的，可利用的，有用的，有空的，接受探访的 to everyone，and everyone needs it. Some people use the air to sustain them while they sit around and feel sorry for themselves. Others breathe in the air and use the energy it provides to make a magnificentmagnificent adj.华丽的，高尚的，宏伟的 life for themselves.