“A match and a cigarette.”
I nearly called out in my joy and my amazement. He wasspeaking in his natural voice—a little weak, perhaps, but the veryvoice I knew. There was a long pause, and I felt that CulvertonSmith was standing in silent amazement looking down at hiscompanion.
“What’s the meaning of this?” I heard him say at last in a dry,rasping tone.
“The best way of successfully acting a part is to be it,” saidHolmes. “I give you my word that for three days I have tastedneither food nor drink until you were good enough to pour meThe Adventure of Wisteria Lodge 1181
out that glass of water. But it is the tobacco which I find mostirksome. Ah, here are some cigarettes.” I heard the striking of amatch. “That is very much better. Halloa! halloa! Do I hear thestep of a friend?”
There were footfalls outside, the door opened, and InspectorMorton appeared.
“All is in order and this is your man,” said Holmes.
The officer gave the usual cautions.
“I arrest you on the charge of the murder of one Victor Savage,”
he concluded.
“And you might add of the attempted murder of one SherlockHolmes,” remarked my friend with a chuckle. “To save an invalidtrouble, Inspector, Mr. Culverton Smith was good enough to giveour signal by turning up the gas. By the way, the prisoner has asmall box in the right-hand pocket of his coat which it would beas well to remove. Thank you. I would handle it gingerly if I wereyou. Put it down here. It may play its part in the trial.”
There was a sudden rush and a scuffle, followed by the clash ofiron and a cry of pain.
“You’ll only get yourself hurt,” said the inspector. “Stand still,will you?” There was the click of the closing handcuffs.
“A nice trap!” cried the high, snarling voice. “It will bring youinto the dock, Holmes, not me. He asked me to come here tocure him. I was sorry for him and I came. Now he will pretend, nodoubt, that I have said anything which he may invent which willcorroborate his insane suspicions. You can lie as you like, Holmes.
My word is always as good as yours.”
“Good heavens!” cried Holmes. “I had totally forgotten him.
My dear Watson, I owe you a thousand apologies. To think thatI should have overlooked you! I need not introduce you to Mr.
Culverton Smith, since I understand that you met somewhatearlier in the evening. Have you the cab below? I will follow youwhen I am dressed, for I may be of some use at the station.
“I never needed it more,” said Holmes as he refreshed himselfwith a glass of claret and some biscuits in the intervals of histoilet. “However, as you know, my habits are irregular, and such afeat means less to me than to most men. It was very essential thatI should impress Mrs. Hudson with the reality of my condition,since she was to convey it to you, and you in turn to him. Youwon’t be offended, Watson? You will realize that among your manytalents dissimulation finds no place, and that if you had sharedmy secret you would never have been able to impress Smith withthe urgent necessity of his presence, which was the vital point ofthe whole scheme. Knowing his vindictive nature, I was perfectlycertain that he would come to look upon his handiwork.”
1182 The Complete Sherlock Holmes
“But your appearance, Holmes—your ghastly face?”
“Three days of absolute fast does not improve one’s beauty,Watson. For the rest, there is nothing which a sponge may notcure. With vaseline upon one’s forehead, belladonna in one’seyes, rouge over the cheek-bones, and crusts of beeswax roundone’s lips, a very satisfying effect can be produced. Malingeringa subject upon which I have sometimes thought of writing amonograph. A little occasional talk about half-crowns, oysters,or any other extraneous subject produces a pleasing effect ofdelirium.”
“But why would you not let me near you, since there was intruth no infection?”
“Can you ask, my dear Watson? Do you imagine that I have norespect for your medical talents? Could I fancy that your astutejudgment would pass a dying man who, however weak, had norise of pulse or temperature? At four yards, I could deceive you.
I failed to do so, who would bring my Smith within my grasp?
No, Watson, I would not touch that box. You can just see if youlook at it sideways where the sharp spring like a viper’s toothemerges as you open it. I dare say it was by some such device thatpoor Savage, who stood between this monster and a reversion,was done to death. My correspondence, however, is, as you know,varied one, and I am somewhat upon my guard against anypackages which reach me. It was clear to me, however, that bypretending that he had really succeeded in his design I mightsurprise a confession. That pretence I have carried out with thethoroughness of the true artist. Thank you, Watson, you must helpme on with my coat. When we have finished at the police-stationthink that something nutritious at Simpson’s would not be outof place.”
The Disappearance of Lady Frances Carfax“But why Turkish?” asked Mr. Sherlock Holmes, gazing fixedlyat my boots. I was reclining in a cane-backed chair at the moment,and my protruded feet had attracted his ever-active attention.
“English,” I answered in some surprise. “I got them at Latimer’s,in Oxford Street.”
Holmes smiled with an expression of weary patience.
“The bath!” he said; “the bath! Why the relaxing and expensiveTurkish rather than the invigorating home-made article?”
“Because for the last few days I have been feeling rheumatic andold. A Turkish bath is what we call an alterative in medicine—afresh starting-point, a cleanser of the system.
The Adventure of Wisteria Lodge 1183
“By the way, Holmes,” I added, “I have no doubt the connectionbetween my boots and a Turkish bath is a perfectly self-evidentone to a logical mind, and yet I should be obliged to you if youwould indicate it.”
“The train of reasoning is not very obscure, Watson,” saidHolmes with a mischievous twinkle. “It belongs to the sameelementary class of deduction which I should illustrate if I were toask you who shared your cab in your drive this morning.”