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第15章 The Goloshes of Fortune(9)

We perceive, by these remarks, that he had already become a poet. By most poets what he had said would be considered commonplace, or as the Germans call it, “insipid.” It is a foolish fancy to look upon poets as different to other men. There are many who are more the poets of nature than those who are professed poets. The difference is this, the poets intellectual memory is better, he seizes upon an idea or a sentiment, until he can embody it, clearly and plainly in words, which the others cannot do. But the transition from a character of everyday life to one of a more gifted nature is a great transitiontransition n.转变, 转换, 跃迁, 过渡, 变调, and so the clerk became aware of the change after a time.

我们已经知道,他成了一个诗人。这个改变的过程并不是很突然的,如果人们以为诗人跟别的人不同,那是很愚蠢的想法。在普通人当中,有许多人的气质比那些公认的诗人还更富有诗意呢。他们的差别是,诗人有更强的理智记忆力:他能牢牢地保持住感情和思想,直到它们清楚明白地形成字句为止,一般人是做不到这一点的。不过从一个平常的气质转变为一个天才,无论如何要算得是一个转变过程。录事现在就在经历这个过程。

“What a delightful perfume,” said he, “it reminds me of the violets at Aunt Loras. Ah, that was when I was a little boy. Dear me, how long it seems since I thought of those days! She was a good old maiden lady! she lived yonder, behind the Exchange. She always had a sprig or a few blossoms in water, let the winter be ever so severe. I could smell the violets, even while I was placing warm penny pieces against the frozen panes to make peepholes, and a pretty view it was on which I peeped. Out in the river lay the ships, icebound, and forsaken by their crews, a screaming crow represented the only living creature on board. But when the breezes of spring came, everything started into life. Amidst shouting and cheers the ships were tarred and rigged, and then they sailed to foreign lands.

“多么醉人的香气啊!”他说。“这真叫我想起洛拉姑姑家的紫罗兰来!是的,那是当我还是一个小孩子的时候闻到的!天啦,我好久没有想到这件事情!善良的老小姐!她住在交易所后面。不管冬天的气候是怎样寒冷,她总是在水里培养一根枝条和几根绿芽。当我把一个热铜板贴在结了冰花窗的玻璃上来融化出一个视孔的时候,看见她的紫罗兰盛开了。这是一个可爱的景象。外面的运河上,船只都冻结在冰里,船员们都离去了,只有一只尖叫的乌鸦是惟一留下的生物。后来,当春风吹起的时候,一切又活跃起来了。人们在欢呼和喊声中把冰层打开了,船也上了油,桅杆也配上了索具,于是它们便向海外的国家开去。

“I remain here, and always shall remain, sitting at my post at the police office, and letting others take passports to distant lands. Yes, this is my fate,” and he sighed deeply. Suddenly he paused. “Good gracious, what has come over me? I never felt before as I do now, it must be the air of spring. It is overpowering, and yet it is delightful.”

“但是我仍然留在这儿,而且永远留在这儿,坐在警察署里,让别人好领取护照到外国去旅行。这就是我的命运。啊,这就是生活!”他深深地叹了一口气。但是他忽然又停住了,“我的老天爷!这是怎么一回事?我从来没有像现在这样的思想和感觉!这一定是春天的气息在作怪!它既使人激动,又使人感到愉快!”

He felt in his pockets for some of his papers. “These will give me something else to think of,” said he. Casting his eyes on the first page of one, he read, “‘Mistress Sigbirth, an original Tragedy, in Five Acts.’ What is this?—in my own handwriting, too! Have I written this tragedy?” He read again, “‘The Intrigueintrigue n.阴谋, 诡计vi.密谋, 私通vt.激起……的兴趣, 用诡计取得 on the Promenade; or, the FastDay. A Vaudeville.’ However did I get all this? Some one must have put them into my pocket. And here is a letter!” It was from the manager of a theatre, the pieces were rejected, not at all in polite terms.

他把手伸到衣袋里掏出文件。“这些东西现在可以分分我的心,”他说,同时让自己的眼睛在第一页上溜。“西格卜丽思夫人——五幕悲剧,”他念着。“这是怎么一回事?这还是我亲手写的字呢。难道我写了这部悲剧吗?散步场上的阴谋,或者,忏悔的日子——歌舞喜剧。我从什么地方弄到这些东西呢?一定是别人放进我的衣袋里的。现在又有一封信!” 是的,这是剧院的经理写来的。剧本被拒绝了,而且信里的字眼也很不客气。

“Hem, hem!” said he, sitting down on a bench, his thoughts were very elastic, and his heart softened strangely. Involuntarily he seized one of the nearest flowers, it was a little, simple daisy. All that botanistsbotanist n.植物学家 can say in many lectures was explained in a moment by this little flower. It spoke of the glory of its birth, it told of the strength of the sunlight, which had caused its delicate leaves to expand, and given to it such sweet perfume. The struggles of life which arouse sensations in the bosom have their type in the tiny flowers. Air and light are the lovers of the flowers, but light is the favored one, towards light it turns, and only when light vanishes does it fold its leaves together, and sleep in the embraces of the air.”

“哼!哼!”录事说,同时在一个凳子上坐下来。他的思想是那么活跃,他的心是那么温柔。他不自觉地扯下长在近旁的一朵花。这是一朵很普通的小雏菊。一个植物学家要花几堂课才能对我们讲得清楚的东西,这朵花只需一分钟就解释清楚了。它讲出它出生的经过,它讲出太阳光的力量——太阳光使它细巧的叶儿展开,发出香气。于是他想起了生活的斗争,这斗争也同样唤醒我们胸中的情感。阳光和空气都是花儿的爱人,不过阳光是更被爱的一位。它把面孔掉向阳光,只有当阳光消逝了的时候,花儿才卷起叶子,在空气的拥抱中睡过去。

“It is light that adorns me,” said the flower.

“只有阳光才使我显得漂亮!”花儿说。

“But the air gives you the breath of life!” whispered the poet.

“但是空气使你呼吸!”诗人的声音低语着。

Just by him stood a boy, splashing with his stick in a marshy ditch. The waterdrops spurted up among the green twigs, and the clerk thought of the millions of animalculae which were thrown into the air with every drop of water, at a height which must be the same to them as it would be to us if we were hurled beyond the clouds. As the clerk thought of all these things, and became conscious of the great change in his own feelings, he smiled, and said to himself, “I must be asleep and dreaming, and yet, if so, how wonderful for a dream to be so natural and real, and to know at the same time too that it is but a dream. I hope I shall be able to remember it all when I wake tomorrow. My sensations seem most unaccountableunaccountable adj.无法解释的, 无责任的. I have a clear perception of everything as if I were wide awake. I am quite sure if I recollect all this tomorrow, it will appear utterly ridiculous and absurd. I have had this happen to me before. It is with the clever or wonderful things we say or hear in dreams, as with the gold which comes from under the earth, it is rich and beautiful when we possess it, but when seen in a true light it is but as stones and withered leaves.”

他身旁站着一个小孩子,用一根棍子在一条泥沟里敲打,弄得几滴泥水溅到树枝上去了。于是录事就想到,水滴里几百万看不见的微生物也必定被溅到空中去了。依照它们体积的比例,它们的情形也正像我们人类被扔到高空中的云块里去一样。当录事想到这一点,以及他的思想中所起的整个变化的时候,他就微笑了。“我是在睡觉,同时也是在做梦!一个人很自然地做起梦来,而同时又知道这是一场梦——这该是多么稀奇的事情啊!我希望明天醒来以后,还能把这一切记得清清楚楚。我有一种稀有的愉快的感觉。我现在什么东西都看得清楚!我觉得自己的头脑非常清醒!不过,我知道,明天如果我能记得某些情景的话,我一定会觉得这是幻想。但是我已经亲身体验过,一切聪明和美丽的东西,正如妖精藏在地底下的钱一样,人们只能在梦中听到和谈到。当一个人得到这些东西的时候,他是豪华和富贵的,不过在阳光下检查一下,它们就只是石头和干枯的叶子罢了。”