How to be True to Yourself
My grandparents believed you were either honest or you weren’t. There was no in between. They had a simple motto hanging on their living-room wall: “Life is like a field of newly fallen snow; where I choose to walk every step will show.” They didn’t have to talk about it—they demonstrated the motto by the way they lived.
They understood instinctively that integrity means having a personal standard of morality and ethics that does not sell out to expediency and that is not relative to the situation at hand. Integrity is an inner standard for judging your behavior. Unfortunately, integrity is in short supply today—and getting scarcer. But it is the real bottom line in every area of society. And it is something we must demand of ourselves.
A good test for this value is to look at what I call the Integrity Triad, which consists of three key principles:
1. Stand firmly for your convictions in the face of personal pressure.
There’s a story told about a surgical nurse’s first day on the medical team at a well-known hospital. She was responsible for ensuring that all instruments and materials were accounted for during an abdominal operation. The nurse said to the surgeon, “You’ve only removed 11 sponges, and we used 12. We need to find the last one.”
“I removed them all,” the doctor declared. “We’ll close now.”
“You can’t do that, sir,” objected the rookie nurse. “Think of the patient.” Smiling, the surgeon lifted his foot and showed the nurse the 12th sponge.
“You’ll do just fine in this or any other hospital,” he told her. When you know you’re right, you can’t back down.
2. Always give others credit that is rightfully theirs. Don’t be afraid of those who might have a better idea or who might even be smarter than you are.
David Ogilvy, founder of the advertising firm Ogilvy & Mather, made this point clear to his newly appointed office heads by sending each a Russian nesting doll with five progressively smaller figures inside. His message was contained in the smallest doll:
“If each of us hires people who are smaller than we are, we shall become a company of dwarfs. But if each of us hires people who are bigger than we are, Ogilvy & Mather will become a company of giants.” And that is precisely what the company became—one of the largest and most respected advertising organizations in the world.
3. Be honest and open about who you really are. People who lack genuine core values rely on external factors— their looks or status—in order to feel good about themselves. Inevitably they will do everything they can to preserve this facade, but they will do very little to develop their inner value and personal growth.
So be yourself. Don’t engage in a personal cover-up of areas that are unpleasing in your life. When it’s tough, do it tough. In other words, face reality and be adult in your responses to life’s challenges.
我的祖父母认为，人要么诚实，要么不诚实，不可能居于两者之间。他们在起居室的墙上挂着一幅简短的箴言：“生活就像刚被白雪覆盖的原野，无论走到哪儿，都会出现我的脚印。”他们从不提及——而是身体力行去实践这句箴言。
他们本能地懂得，诚实意味着有个人道德标准，既不见利忘义，也不趋炎附势。诚实是评判举止的内在标准。遗憾的是，当今社会越来越缺少诚信，而它却是社会每一个领域的真正底线，也是我们对自己的必须要求。
检验这种价值，要依据我所谓的“诚实三和弦”，它包括三个主要原则：
1．面对个人压力，要坚定信念。
有这样一个故事：在一个著名的医院，一个外科护士第一天到医疗组上班。在一个腹部手术中，她负责对所有器材进行清点时，对外科医生说，“你只取出11块纱布，可我们用了12块，必须找到最后一块。”
“我都取出来了，”医生断言，“现在要缝合刀口了。”
“您不能这样，先生，”新来的护士抗议道，“得想想病人，”外科医生抬起脚，笑着给护士看第12块纱布。
他告诉护士：“不论你是在这所医院，还是其他地方，都会干得很好的。”当你确定自己正确时，就不能退缩。
2．经常赞扬那些值得肯定的人。不要惧怕那些比你更有见解、更机智的人。
戴维·奥格尔维是奥格尔维和马瑟广告公司的创始人，他给每一个新上任的部门经理送一个俄罗斯式套娃，里面有依次变小的5个娃娃。最小的一个里面有他的留言，清晰地告诉他们：
“如果我们雇佣的每一个人都比我们矮小，我们就会成为侏儒公司。但是，反过来，如果雇佣的人都很高大，奥格尔维和马瑟将成为巨人公司。”正是这样，这个公司后来成为世界上最大最有声望的广告公司。
3．真诚、坦率地展现真我风采。只有缺乏核心价值观的人才会依靠外界因素——他们的外貌或地位——为了使自我感觉良好，不可避免地，他们会掩饰内心，不去培养自己的核心价值，也不注重自我成长。
所以，要做你自己。不要掩饰生活中不尽人意的方方面面，要坚强地面对生活中的困难时刻。换言之，面对现实，要成熟地应对生活中的种种挑战。
1. They understood instinctively_________integrity means having a personal standard of morality and ethics that_________not sell out to expediency and_________is not relative to the situation at hand.
2. Always_________others credit that is rightfully theirs. Don’t be afraid of those______might have a better idea or who might_________be smarter than you are.
3. Be honest and_________about who you really are. People who lack genuine core_________rely on external factors—their looks or status—in order to feel good_________themselves.
1. 生活就像刚被白雪覆盖的原野，无论走到哪儿，都会出现我的脚印。
2. 当你确定自己正确时，就不能退缩。
3. 不要掩饰生活中不尽人意的方方面面，要坚强地面对生活中的困难时刻。