163.This loud cry awakened Kyuutarou out of his deep trance.Immediately he stood up and went home，although it was still work time.And that was the first time for him to come off work earlier than the due time.He was not aware how he walked back，and he did not know how many times he fell down to the ground.When he was home，Kyuutarou was all in dust.
164.Seeing Kyuutarou all in dust，Mieko said nothing.She helped to wash his face gently at first，and then help him to change his clothes silently.And then，she took the dirty clothes to the laundry and put them into a washing machine.
165.At the moment when she was to press down the switch，a pair of hands held her tightly.Mieko knew it must be Kyuutarou.
166.Mieko said no words，allowing him fondle her，kiss her cheeks.She kept silent，without let out any voices.She just responded to his fervidity in silence.
167.Kyuutarou's hands fondled her gently，from her projecting breasts to her raised belly，from her slim shoulders to her hot neck，and from her sensitive ears to…
168.If it were before，Mieko had plunged into her husband's breasts，groaning and responding to his fervidity as best as she could，but now she was like a cold statue，all the heat before had now disappeared.These changes were such a misery that they were beyond Kyuutarou's endurance，he was most afraid of the continuance of such misery.For he knew that such things had happened in the last generation，and at the same time，he knew that he was the very source of all these，and that only he could change it.
169.That night，Kyuutarou sensitively found that his intimacy with Mieko had become so dull because of her coldness，but still he felt some uncontrollable passions deep in her body from time to time，and even some impulse deep in the unconsciousness.Mieko's feelings towards him did not completely demise，and she needed him in the deep of her bones，and that was just a hope to save and restore their previous harmony.
170.Kyuutarou thought it over for the whole night.At dawn，he finally said to Mieko，"This morning，I'll ask to quit from that organization，and promise you I'll never do those stupid things anymore.After speculation，I've come to know in the deep of my mind that those things are childish and stupid，such as attacking people with slingshots，piercing tires，taking the Americans by surprise and chiseling the bottoms of boats.Now I've profoundly realized those foolish activities would endanger both the society and the family.That should be a game of youngsters，not a business of a man at the age of mine."
171.At Kyuutarou's confession，Mieko replied with a gentle "eh".Despite a ****** syllable，it was like a thunder in winter or a heavy rain in drought seasons to Kyuutarou.It brought joyance to him.Kyuutarou was well aware that his apology for his mistakes had touched Mieko，and her numbed heart and feelings were gradually waking up，and she was gradually curing her trauma.
172.When Kyuutarou left for his office after breakfast，Mieko said，"see you" in a low voice.He kept excited for a whole day for these two words.
173.That day，Kyuutarou did many other things except for his routine work.He bought a set of maternity dress at lunch time at first，with the color Mieko chose by herself a month ago； and then，he wrote a letter to tell the action group that he had determined to quit，and decided to invite them to a dinner and to say farewell.
174.His men arrived on the invitation，but that dinner was oppressive.The people talked much.They mentioned the happiness in their childhood，their pleasure when they stabbed the tires of American soldiers，and the exultation when they beat American seamen.But they talked more about their heartfelt pains at the departure，of course.They drank for a long time，and all people were drunk and cried at the end.
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175.Kyuutarou changed at home that night； he became tacit，without a single word all night.He even did not say anything when Mieko woke him up for breakfast and urged him to go and work.
176.More unexpectedly，Kyuutarou kept silent even after he was in his company.He did not say a single word to anybody at the company for three consecutive days； sometimes he sat there alone，remaining tacit.
177.Kyuutarou's colleagues were confused and they phoned Mieko to ask why，"What's the matter with you and Kyuutarou？Had you quarreled？It would endanger your perfect marriage.Show more solicitude to Kyuutarou，Mieko.He has not said a single word at the company for three days.Kyuutarou has been excellent in all respects，so he is a pride of our company，but more a pride of yours，Mieko.Hope you can really cherish him，or he would be destroyed in such depression..." the colleagues told Mieko on the line.
178.Again Kyuutarou returned home woodenly，he seemed to have seen nothing，nor did he help Mieko with housework.He walked straightly upstairs to the attic，sitting at the tatami，keeping tacit over there.
179.Mieko knew Kyuutarou felt distressed because of his departure from his organizations and accompanies.And she was also aware that sentimental trauma would cause deeper，longer and incurable misery in a man.
180.Mieko knew better that emotional trauma had to be cured through sensibility，and that emotional confusion had to be removed by means of warm feelings.
181.That night，she sat face to face with Kyuutarou，fondling his cheeks with both hands.She said passionately，"Kyuutarou，let's have a talk calmly tonight，all right？It's time for us to have a good talk."
182.Kyuutarou spoke noting，and he simply nodded in silence.
183.Seeing Kyuutarou nodded his head in agreement，Mieko began to talk."Your father is a Chinese，a solder resisting Japanese，but your grandpa，your mother Kiyoha and their family were a part of the so-called "explorers"，who were actually invaders.